Acid on your face and a hole in your Butt

Got your attention, didn't I?! Well, the sad part is that the title of this post is actually the later part of my afternoon yesterday. I went to the (dun, dun, dunnnn) dermatologist yesterday. I was getting a chemical peel, which I strangely enjoy because I feel that when my skin is all tight is somehow makes my tummy seem skinnier, my clothes fit better and my butt a bit perkier. So in reality, that part wasn't so bad.

My butt, on the other hand; different story. I had a skin test done to check my moley moley moles to make sure I was good to go, but noooooo. Doc said " I'm going to need to numb your butt and take this mole off and send it to the lab". GREAAAAAAAAAAAAAT. Fast forward to me face down on this tabe getting a needle stuck in my tush. Fast forward to this morning where I am a whiney little baby that I can't seem to sit comfortably in my fabulous ergonomic desk chair. WAH. I'll keep you updated on if I'll need to invest in some fabulous wigs. I'm thinkin red :)

YMCA Armed Forces 8k Mudrun

Life is nuts. But that doesn't mean that it's ok to get fat. At least that's what I keep telling myself. Throughout college, I definitely enjoyed myself. I drank what I wanted, ate what I wanted annnnd became a big fat pig. Combine that with the fact that my eating habits already solely consisted of chicken fingers and hot dogs (still my favorites ps) and lets just say I slightly resembled roseanne. Gew- I know.

Moving on- I decided post college that I needed to get moving and learn to eat things that are green. It's still a challenge to choose veggies over fries, but I try to take it day by day. It's been a slow process that I've had my ups and downs in, but today am about 31 pounds lighter than in college. Woohooo go me!

One thing that REALLY helps are my amazing friends who like to torture me by having me run in insane races. Case in point- the 8k "mud" run. This run turned out to be MUCH more of a sand dune run, and was by far the hardest hour and a half of my life, but I can say that I finished it! My dearest friend Lindsay compiled our team, the MudCrawlers!, and off to Virginia Beach we went. We got about 5 hours of sleep the night before all crammed into one hotel room (there were 5 girls on our team) and I don't think anyone really got and GOOD sleep with me coughing every 5 seconds. Despite our up hill climbing we had to do (literally) we made it through the 5 miles of sand dunes, running on the beach, through the woods, through trenches, mud pits, over walls, through tunnels, etc. I can't say I'll ever do it again, but who are we kidding.. if she asked, I probably wouldnt say no. :) YAY for weight loss!!!

He's Home :)

He's home and life is good! Lindsay and I had a great time roadtrippin' down to Virginia Beach on Thursday, June 30th and got Luke off the bus around 8pm on the 1st. We spent the weekend running errands, getting his new barracks set up, celebrating with his friends (the first time I got to meet any of them) BBQ-ing with his family and just enjoying being together. I'm a happy girl.

25 Things You Might Not Know About Me

Generally speaking, I'd consider myself a pretty "normal" 27 year old girl. I like to hang out with my friends, I love shoes and I'm slightly obsessed with the Chicken Madiera from Cheesecake Factory. Just like every other 27 year old girl, right??

Some would say though, that I'm not normal. Hopefully, they mean this is a nice way, at least that's the way I'm taking it :) It got me thinking though, what are the things that make me different than your average bear. thus.. the list.

1. I don't like a lot of sauce on my pizza, hardly any in fact. I've been known to take off the cheese, scrape off all of the sauce, put the cheese back on and continue eating.
2. My favorite sandwhich is a bacon and mayo sandwhich. It sounds gross, and to most people it probably is, but I love it. I think it all started when my dad would make BLT's all the time, but I didn't like lettuce or tomatoes.
3. I like having a schedule. The unexpected makes me nervous. I say ALLL the time that I want to be spontaneous, but it's not true.
4. I crack my knuckles ALL the time.
5. I usually have a koozie in my purse at all times. In fact, if you were to go look at my purse collection, you'd see all the purses empty inside, except for a koozie.
6. I can't fall asleep unless all of the drawers on the dresser are closed with no clothing sticking out.
7. I wear my socks inside out because I think it's annoying how the seam on the end of the sock pushes against your foot with you wear it.
8. I love cemetaries. I think they are beautiful- especially Arlington National Cemetary and any of the ones in Texas where they overtake the grave sights with fake ugly flowers. It's love.
9. I hate opening presents in front of people. I feel like I neever react apropriately.
10. When I was in high school, I would rearrange the furnityre in my bedroom just about every week, and I took all of the notes my friends wrote me and put them on my walls. You couldnt see any of my wallpaper.
10. I hate body lotion. I never use it.
11. I love bridges. I'd love to get a good camera and have a wall of framed black and white photos in my house of beautiful bridges from across the country. Churches too.
12. When I was in middle school my choir sang "Killing me softly" by the Fugees and I got the Lauren Hill solo part. Yup, that's right, I'm a superstar.
13. I would eat a hot dog and an Auntie Anne's salted pretzal every day if someone would let me.. or I wouldnt get outrageously fat.

I should probably end my list on a good number (15,20,25)....butttt that would be too normal ;)

From Afghanland, with love...

As you may or may not have known (probably "may not have known" since I'm a wierdo and don't often share boy news) I landed myself my very own hot to trot marine boyfriend about 10 months ago! I know, I'm pretty shocked too. This is the "YAY" part of my story.

Unfortunately, soon after we got stars in our eyes for each other, he had to leave for Afghanistan for 7 months. This is the "Boooo" part of the story. Throughout the past 7 months, we've written letters (mine were written daily, his were written when he could) sent care packages, talked on the phone when we could and near the end we even got to have skype dates. It was nerve-racking (especially after he got blown up by an IED in January), exhausting and frustrating.. but now it's OVER!!! I leave tomorrow afternoon to drive down to Camp Lejune North Carolina to welcome my marine home!

Life is all rainbows and flowers and puppies and cupcakes right now and I LOVE IT!!

Missed me, didn't cha?

Wow. Crazy to think how time flies. It's been over a year since I've posted and I partially blame that on my father. I get my stubborn-ness from him, or at least that's what my Mom says. A couple people have asked me to continue my ranting on here, but I've always come up with a lame excuse as to why I haven't. No longer will I resist though.

Today's topic of discussion/ random thought of the day, comes from my co-workers. Most co-workers like to discuss their families, recent hollywood star gossip, or lately "the royal wedding", but MY lovely co-workers and I decided to discuss the topic of eyebrows.

Yes, eyebrows.

They are one of those things that you never really think that much about really. But why do we even have them? If we have hair all over our bodies, mainly for the purpose of keeping out germs and dirt, then why do we have wierd long hair right above our eyes? Mel (my coworker) seems to think that back in cave man days, people would grow their eyebrows out realllllly long so that they had a sort of cousin IT hair do rockin' and it would protect their eyes from the massive amounts of dirt flying around them. Who knows.

People do wierd things with their eyebrows. Back in the day, I used to pluck my eyebrows as a hobby, and as a result really only had about two hairs on each side above my eye. I looked georgous, let me tell you. (See picture, yikes!). Please don't mind the fact that I also am about 900 pounds heavier and failed in my attempt to cut my hair like Reese Witherspoon in "Sweet Home Alabama". Didn't work.

Some people pluck, some people wax, some people shave their eyebrows and tattoo on top of their eyes what they want their eyebrows to look like. There are unibrows, catepillar eyebrows, skinny eyebrows, thick eyebrows, eyebrows that dont match your hair color, I mean the list goes on and on.

The moral of the story, is this isn't one. Just random thoughts around the watercooler.

Off to go pluck my eyebrows...

Yous Da Bomb.Com!!

www.thisisphotobomb.com

Just some hump day humor for ya :)

Something Smells Fishy

As I was walking home last night from work, I was anxious to get home- it had been a long day and I was ready to relax. Of course I couldn't venture down to my gym in fear of running (no pun intended, ha!) into the millions of people who's New Year's resolution was to work out more OR to run into psycho EX personal trainer toothless man. yikes. You'll be happy to know I haven't had any more episodes with him- it's as if he has disappeared. Although, now that I've said that I am SURE he will pop up again. Maybe he got a new grill for Christmas.

Back on track- so I was strolling along, trying not to get knocked over by the crazy wind that has come to town, when I smelled something grossssss. I couldn't figure out what it was, ( I think I'm happy I couldn't) but I realized that I smell a LOT of funky stuff walking home and thought I'd share. Sharing is caring after all :)

1. Leaving work, normally my favvvvorite popcorn stand guy, Mike, is still in his cart on the street corner selling his poppie corn and chatting with everyone. The fabulous aroma of his cart gets me every time. I love his popcorn and I am here to promote him. It's cheap and it's goood and I love Mike. BONUS- he hasn't ever hit on me. Now I've probably jinxed myself though.

2. On the metro- this smelly area changes daily. During the summer it can be sweaty smelling, and during the winter you tend to smell more perfumes/colognes, etc. I'll never understand why people think that drenching themselves in smelly smells makes them smell good. You simply smell like you are incompetent and can't figure out what an appropriate amount is. Dummies.

3. Walking up the Chinatown metro escalator- smoke. There's always tons of people smoking their cancer sticks up there. It's the hot spot for all kinds of crazies. There's sweaty gym guys trying to get you to pump some iron in Washington Sports Club, homeless guys selling umbrellas (they all smell different) and high school/middle school kids having break dancing competitions- I try not to get too close to them because I don't want them to challenge me to a dance off b/c I'd have to break it down. I'd rock their world with a sweet combo of MC hammer,Michael Jackson and throw in a little Britney bitch at the end for good measure. On second thought, maybe I shouldn't shelter the world from my dancing skills anymore?? hmm.

Back on Topic.

4. The bus stoppers- these people stand for the bus and I think that there must be some law that I don't know about that says that if you stand for the bus in front of Chinatown that you need to smoke grape flavored black and milds. It is the wierdest thing. But they smell- and they spit! Maybe they can't handle all the grape flavor and feel the need to spit, but I feel like I'm running through an obstacle course with camels spitting at me and I gotta be quick to dodge their wads of smelly grape saliva. Ew.

5. The food- Walking by the "Big Wong", "Wok and Roll", "Vappianos", and the wierd place on the corner that used to be a XXX video store but now says they sell sushi (I'm not sure if that's code for something else) you smell a LOT of food. Individually it kinda smells good, but mix it all together and yeah- not so much.

Oh the joys of the city :)

O' Christmas Cruise, O' Christmas Cruise

Yes- the rumors are true. The stupid blizzard of 2009 hit the DC area JUSSSSST as I was starting to pack my bag for my flight to Florida, to hop on my cruise ship and snorkel, horseback ride, and play around on the beaches of the caribbean for christmas. Eh- it's the way it goes. I choose to be a "glass half full" kinda gal and thus I have decided to list all of the reasons why I am HAPPY that I was in the DC area for the Christmas holiday.. and the Kwanzaa holiday too- I don't discriminate.

1. If I hadn't stayed in the DC area, I wouldn't have been able to see the big riot/protest going on outside of the chinatown metro today. I THOUGHT as I was walking up the escalator that they were saying "SET GAGA FREE!" and I got really upset because I thought the fabulous (and slightly off her rocker) Ms. Lady GAGA had been arrested for some proposterous crime unrightfully so.. Turns out they were chanting "SET GAZA FREE!" I guess the gaza strip? I'm not sure. I'll google it tommorrow.

2. If I hadn't stayed in the DC area, I would have missed the snowball fight up on U street. Unfortunately, I wasn't present- but boy was it all over the news. A ton of kids up here decided to have a huge snowball fight in the middle of U street- why not right? There's 2 feet of snow on the ground- not like any SMART person would be trying to drive though it right?!?! WRONNNGGG.. an off duty police officer decided to drive through the snowball fight (in his red hummer, ha!) and got pissed when he got hit by some snowballs. He proceeded to pull out his gun and start waving it around like a lunatic. After he settled a bit, all the kids started chanting " You don't bring a gun to a snowball fight!!" Ha! I love it.

3. If I hadn't stayed in the DC area, I wouldn't have gotten to expereince another reason why I love where I live. The roomie and I placed a call to our local papa johns (RIGHT across the street) and trecked out in the knee deep snow to grab a slice and a coke. I love the little reminders of why I pay so much money to live where I live. While everyone else was stuck inside, I could WALK down the street and go shopping, go to the movies.. I love DC.

4. Last but not least, I'm sure if I had left DC, my cruise ship would've turned into the sequal of the Titanic and hit a whale or something and sunk. I haven't had much good luck lately, but hopefully that'll change in the new year!!

Hasta Lluego blognogs!

GOOOO NAVY!

This past weekend was probably one of my favorite weekend of the whole year. Every year I travel (to wherever they are playing, usually in Philly) to see the Army Navy game with my best friend Katie and her family! OF COURSE, we all root for Navy to win, as they should, and they haven't let me down yet! Thought I'd throw a few pictorals up on the ole bloggie blog so you can all see us shivering our navy and gold butts off! We are well known at the 'bumble bee' crew, and from the pictures I think you'll be able to see why! We all purchase one new thing each year for the games and last year we purchased the rock star-esk rugby shirts. They are fantastic because it is easy to lose people in the sea of navy/gold and black/gold that everyone sports for their team. There was lots of great food in our club level seats( they are a must in order to not freeze to death) including nachos, 12 dollar hot dogs and sodas bigger than your head... totally not on the diet, but SO worth it. You only live once, right!!?? We ate Philly cheesesteaks at Big Ricks (oddly enough Katies dads name minus the "big" part) shopped at Macy's, went to our favorite chocolate and coffee shop (called Naked Chocolate) and had dinner at a murder mystery dinner theater where a drunken woman named Terry stole the show! ..that's a story for a whole other postie though. Can't WAIT for next year!!

Get pumped.. get pumped up

Christmas is RIGHT around the corner, 8 whole days to be exact, but my festive fun starts earlier this year- as in Sunday! That's right mini micro munchkins mumbling about muffins, I'm going CRUISIN! Mi Madre y yo ( my momma and I) are going on a cruise-y susie this year- to the Caribbean!! We leave Sunday and go to Ft. Laurerdale, Bahamas, St. Thomas, St. Marteen (we're here actually on Christmas) and Grand Turks. Lined up on our shor excursions are a glass bottom boat tour, going to paradise point in St. Thomas, a cattamaran boat ride, and possibly riding horseback in the ocean! It's gonna be fantabulous! Hopefully Santa will still know where to find me- but he might have to lose his Santa suit for a pair of swim trunks! I'm sure the locals will lure him in with the fantastic "rum punch" I keep hearing about!

BON VOYAGE TO ME!!!

On a serious note

A friend of mine from high school and college, Joshua Himan, joined the marines and was deployed to Afghanistan. While on deployment, he was severly injured. His brother started a blog to update those interested on his progress and journey to recovery. Josh is possibly one of the niecst people you'll ever meet. He may have big muscles (and love to look at them, haha) and put on a tough face..but after 5 minutes with him his infectious smile comes out and you realize he's a big teddy bear.

http://joshhiman.blogspot.com

Above is the link to Josh's blog. He's an amazing guy and I would love it if anyone who sees this would keep him (and ALL of the soldiers) in their prayers. God Bless.

Be All That You Can Be..But Not an Toothless Mans Escort

Top O' the mornin to ya - Frequently over the years, I have had many friends tell me that things/situations happen to me that do not happen to anyone else they know (thus the reason for my blog). I always say "no way, I'm sure stuff like this happens to people all the time"..and then I'm proven wrong. Let the story begin.



One of my dearest friends is getting married (YAY!) in September and as one of her maids of honor I decided it would be a good idea to get my big ole' booty in shape for the upcoming nuptials. I started going to the gym in my building much more frequently and trying my very hardest to avoid those delicious little mini chocolate covered donuts in the grocery storewho haunt my dreams every night. While trying my hardest not to fall off of the treadmill one night- I was approached by a man (we will call him BOB so he doesn't stalk and kill me) whom I've seen training people in the gym before. Long story short- I told him I would pay him to train me. Fast forward a few weeks and I've now learned he's a bit sketchy- he tells me things like "eventually I'll just train you for free and you won't have to pay me anything" and constantly asks me if he can "trust me". Soooo the other night he calls me and basically says that he would like to train me for free if I will "get dolled up, go out with him and act the part". He says that I just need to look good so that other people will see how his services have worked. I officially get creeped out because he says I can't tell anyone about this "arrangement" not even my roommate. SKETCHYYYY. He now calls me at work, on my cell phone and I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to hire a body guard to protect me from my EX- personal trainer. GREAT.



So the lesson here kids is- not only can you prevent forest fires, you can also prevent wierdos trying to have you be their escort by avoiding my building while in gym clothes and do not talk to a big guy missing one of his front teeth.



Off to dye/cut my hair and change my name.



Adios, Blogurittos!

For my 2 friends (or 2 people that I know about) who actually read the crazy randomness that sometimes comes out of my mouth and onto this blog- lo siento for slacking off. I realize it's the lamest excuse in the book- but I've been really busy. I helped a friend move/drive 20+ hours from Louisana to NoVa, celebrated my moms 66 birthday by taking her to see "So You Think You Can Dance" in concert (she's so cute), met a lot of new people, celebrated lots of friends birthdays, went to VaTech for homecoming, organized a reunion with lots of my sorority sisters from college, cooked thanksgiving dinner, went to Va Beach to do some maid of honor duties for one of my very best friends, and planned a Christmas cruise with my mom to some tropical islands. On top of allll of this- hockey season has started again (God bless the CAPS). I realize that all this looks and sounds like fun- but it's been a challenging time in my life as well. I've learned a lot about myself in a lot of different ways and am trying to understand what it all means.

..Long story short.. I'm back beaches!!!!

Cleanup: Aisle 10

Ohhh Walmart- the place where all your dreams come true. In my book- way better than Disney World. There were many nights in college when I'd go to the local 24 hour Walmart (if you knew where I went to college you'd understand) and just browse for hours at all of the STUFF you could get. Walmart has got it all!! Unfortuantely, though, I never had the pleasure of running into any of these fine people- although lord knows I did run into a few unique personalities of my own.

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/index.php

Rock on Walmart, rock on.

Crazy Craigslist Charcters

Ohhhh Craigslist.. where to begin?!! Actually, all things considered, I am a big fan of CL ( thats the abbreviation all the cool kids use). It has turned out to be a great place to find housing, lost and found, buy new pets, find new jobs, or a new "relationship". Side note- never have, never will venture into the personals on CL.. bad idea. There are also a lot of wacky postings for which I find myself wondering- "Who in the world would post an ad to give away 9 jars of peanut butter that has been expired since 1994?!?" or "Why would anyone want to buy ONE enclopedia (letter H) .....???" In some ways it's great, in other ways it's just an outlet for people who have nothing better to do-to have something to do. Secretly, I think it would be super fun to go one day and fill up someone's entire front lawn with couches from craigslist.. there are SOOO many on there that are free! Can you imagine opening your front door and finding that you can't see your grass anymore.. just couches!??! Man.. one of these days I'll do it. Watch out friends.

Anywhoooo, I came across this website with ad's from CL, and it brightened my day with a few chuckles.. hopefully it'll do the same for Y-O-U.

http://www.dontevenreply.com/

toodles, bloggifers.

What Not to Wear

There are certain styles, fashions, fads, fabrics, etc. that people should just not wear... ever. I once heard somewhere from someone someplace that DC was rated the #1 worst dressed city in the country. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that this could be true. Some people blame on the commute.. that DC is so career driven that people feel they are giving up looking "fashionable" in order to be comfortable- so that they can focus on their jobs. This is a bad excuse in my book. Although I admit that I have been known to rock some tennis shoes while doing my morning commute.. these tennis shoes are NOT from 1984, NOT high tops, NOT stark white with scrunchie socks like I can't decide whether I work for the government or at hooters, and definitely NOT overtop of pantyhose.I enjoy fashion, can be trendy at times, and of course like to feel that I look good.. but some people take this to a very big extreme.. or completely ignore fashion all together. A happy medium- that's all I'm lookin for. In order to prove my point.. I decided to take inventory of some of the outfits that I see people wearing in and around the city.. that just need to be burned. This also includes trendy trends.. that are just stupid and I am convinced there are designers that get together, sip their starbucks and think.. "what trend should we start that will make people look as ridiculous as possible.. just because we can". I would have taken pictures for your viewing pleasure.. however.. I thought I might get shot.. and I'd like to stay alive, at least until after the next vampire movie (New Moon) comes out.

1. Crushed velvet. This makes me cringe.

2. As previously stated, wearing high top tennis shoes with scrunchy socks overtop of your panty hose walking to work.

3. Short sleeved mens dress shirts.. you just look like someone out of "Office Space" and you look dorky. If you're afraid of getting hot.. wear a long sleeve dress shirt and roll the sleeves. please.

4. Bug sunglasses. This can be a tricky one.. there is a difference between "big" and "bug". If you can't decide if you've crossed the line.. ask a fashionable friend.

5. Peep toed ankle boots. Again.. cringe.

6. neon colored jeans.. unless your legs look like gisele's.. and your walking on a run way.. you look like you stretched your hiney into your jeans from when you were 8.

7. Huge hoop earings with your name written in crusive inside of them. If you are so forgettable to people that you feel that they need to be able to look at your ears to remember your name.. you have bigger problems.

8. Super skinny tight jeans on boys. This is just not.cute. It's even worse when they try to sag these jeans.. makes absolutely no sense at all. (side note- I've never really understood how guys can sag their jeans so much.. Do they have sticky tape on the insides and stick their jeans to their legs so they don't fall all the way down to their ankles?? There much be some trick to it, because in all my years, I have never seen anyone's pants fall completely off of their body while walking.. and I've seen a lot of sagging. Let's not forget- I grew up in Woodbridge.)

9. MC Hammer pants- I've recently seen some celebrities wearing these pants out. I'm convinced those coffee sipping designers had a hand in this. Really!??! you look like you're wearing a diaper.. or that you should be wearing one because you've already messed yourself. Ew.

10. Umm I can't think of a number 10 a the moment.. but it's only 10:00 AM.. I'm sure I can find another fashion disaster by lunch.

Stay tuned bloggifers :)

Bring on the burrito!

Happy National Chipotle Day!! No, unfortunately Chippy's doesnt recognize this holiday (and neither does my company, boo) but we are pushing for it! So go buy a burrito, hug a sexy mexi and rock out with your guac out!

Nom, nom, nom.. yummm

AWKWARRRRDDD

www.awkwardfamilyphotos.com

I have so many photos I could contribute to this website.. but we shall leave that for another day. :)

Thank Goodness It's Friday!

Just something to help you pass the time until 5pm :)

www.picktheperp.com