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Just some hump day humor for ya :)

Something Smells Fishy

As I was walking home last night from work, I was anxious to get home- it had been a long day and I was ready to relax. Of course I couldn't venture down to my gym in fear of running (no pun intended, ha!) into the millions of people who's New Year's resolution was to work out more OR to run into psycho EX personal trainer toothless man. yikes. You'll be happy to know I haven't had any more episodes with him- it's as if he has disappeared. Although, now that I've said that I am SURE he will pop up again. Maybe he got a new grill for Christmas.

Back on track- so I was strolling along, trying not to get knocked over by the crazy wind that has come to town, when I smelled something grossssss. I couldn't figure out what it was, ( I think I'm happy I couldn't) but I realized that I smell a LOT of funky stuff walking home and thought I'd share. Sharing is caring after all :)

1. Leaving work, normally my favvvvorite popcorn stand guy, Mike, is still in his cart on the street corner selling his poppie corn and chatting with everyone. The fabulous aroma of his cart gets me every time. I love his popcorn and I am here to promote him. It's cheap and it's goood and I love Mike. BONUS- he hasn't ever hit on me. Now I've probably jinxed myself though.

2. On the metro- this smelly area changes daily. During the summer it can be sweaty smelling, and during the winter you tend to smell more perfumes/colognes, etc. I'll never understand why people think that drenching themselves in smelly smells makes them smell good. You simply smell like you are incompetent and can't figure out what an appropriate amount is. Dummies.

3. Walking up the Chinatown metro escalator- smoke. There's always tons of people smoking their cancer sticks up there. It's the hot spot for all kinds of crazies. There's sweaty gym guys trying to get you to pump some iron in Washington Sports Club, homeless guys selling umbrellas (they all smell different) and high school/middle school kids having break dancing competitions- I try not to get too close to them because I don't want them to challenge me to a dance off b/c I'd have to break it down. I'd rock their world with a sweet combo of MC hammer,Michael Jackson and throw in a little Britney bitch at the end for good measure. On second thought, maybe I shouldn't shelter the world from my dancing skills anymore?? hmm.

Back on Topic.

4. The bus stoppers- these people stand for the bus and I think that there must be some law that I don't know about that says that if you stand for the bus in front of Chinatown that you need to smoke grape flavored black and milds. It is the wierdest thing. But they smell- and they spit! Maybe they can't handle all the grape flavor and feel the need to spit, but I feel like I'm running through an obstacle course with camels spitting at me and I gotta be quick to dodge their wads of smelly grape saliva. Ew.

5. The food- Walking by the "Big Wong", "Wok and Roll", "Vappianos", and the wierd place on the corner that used to be a XXX video store but now says they sell sushi (I'm not sure if that's code for something else) you smell a LOT of food. Individually it kinda smells good, but mix it all together and yeah- not so much.

Oh the joys of the city :)

O' Christmas Cruise, O' Christmas Cruise

Yes- the rumors are true. The stupid blizzard of 2009 hit the DC area JUSSSSST as I was starting to pack my bag for my flight to Florida, to hop on my cruise ship and snorkel, horseback ride, and play around on the beaches of the caribbean for christmas. Eh- it's the way it goes. I choose to be a "glass half full" kinda gal and thus I have decided to list all of the reasons why I am HAPPY that I was in the DC area for the Christmas holiday.. and the Kwanzaa holiday too- I don't discriminate.

1. If I hadn't stayed in the DC area, I wouldn't have been able to see the big riot/protest going on outside of the chinatown metro today. I THOUGHT as I was walking up the escalator that they were saying "SET GAGA FREE!" and I got really upset because I thought the fabulous (and slightly off her rocker) Ms. Lady GAGA had been arrested for some proposterous crime unrightfully so.. Turns out they were chanting "SET GAZA FREE!" I guess the gaza strip? I'm not sure. I'll google it tommorrow.

2. If I hadn't stayed in the DC area, I would have missed the snowball fight up on U street. Unfortunately, I wasn't present- but boy was it all over the news. A ton of kids up here decided to have a huge snowball fight in the middle of U street- why not right? There's 2 feet of snow on the ground- not like any SMART person would be trying to drive though it right?!?! WRONNNGGG.. an off duty police officer decided to drive through the snowball fight (in his red hummer, ha!) and got pissed when he got hit by some snowballs. He proceeded to pull out his gun and start waving it around like a lunatic. After he settled a bit, all the kids started chanting " You don't bring a gun to a snowball fight!!" Ha! I love it.

3. If I hadn't stayed in the DC area, I wouldn't have gotten to expereince another reason why I love where I live. The roomie and I placed a call to our local papa johns (RIGHT across the street) and trecked out in the knee deep snow to grab a slice and a coke. I love the little reminders of why I pay so much money to live where I live. While everyone else was stuck inside, I could WALK down the street and go shopping, go to the movies.. I love DC.

4. Last but not least, I'm sure if I had left DC, my cruise ship would've turned into the sequal of the Titanic and hit a whale or something and sunk. I haven't had much good luck lately, but hopefully that'll change in the new year!!

Hasta Lluego blognogs!

GOOOO NAVY!

This past weekend was probably one of my favorite weekend of the whole year. Every year I travel (to wherever they are playing, usually in Philly) to see the Army Navy game with my best friend Katie and her family! OF COURSE, we all root for Navy to win, as they should, and they haven't let me down yet! Thought I'd throw a few pictorals up on the ole bloggie blog so you can all see us shivering our navy and gold butts off! We are well known at the 'bumble bee' crew, and from the pictures I think you'll be able to see why! We all purchase one new thing each year for the games and last year we purchased the rock star-esk rugby shirts. They are fantastic because it is easy to lose people in the sea of navy/gold and black/gold that everyone sports for their team. There was lots of great food in our club level seats( they are a must in order to not freeze to death) including nachos, 12 dollar hot dogs and sodas bigger than your head... totally not on the diet, but SO worth it. You only live once, right!!?? We ate Philly cheesesteaks at Big Ricks (oddly enough Katies dads name minus the "big" part) shopped at Macy's, went to our favorite chocolate and coffee shop (called Naked Chocolate) and had dinner at a murder mystery dinner theater where a drunken woman named Terry stole the show! ..that's a story for a whole other postie though. Can't WAIT for next year!!

Get pumped.. get pumped up

Christmas is RIGHT around the corner, 8 whole days to be exact, but my festive fun starts earlier this year- as in Sunday! That's right mini micro munchkins mumbling about muffins, I'm going CRUISIN! Mi Madre y yo ( my momma and I) are going on a cruise-y susie this year- to the Caribbean!! We leave Sunday and go to Ft. Laurerdale, Bahamas, St. Thomas, St. Marteen (we're here actually on Christmas) and Grand Turks. Lined up on our shor excursions are a glass bottom boat tour, going to paradise point in St. Thomas, a cattamaran boat ride, and possibly riding horseback in the ocean! It's gonna be fantabulous! Hopefully Santa will still know where to find me- but he might have to lose his Santa suit for a pair of swim trunks! I'm sure the locals will lure him in with the fantastic "rum punch" I keep hearing about!

BON VOYAGE TO ME!!!

On a serious note

A friend of mine from high school and college, Joshua Himan, joined the marines and was deployed to Afghanistan. While on deployment, he was severly injured. His brother started a blog to update those interested on his progress and journey to recovery. Josh is possibly one of the niecst people you'll ever meet. He may have big muscles (and love to look at them, haha) and put on a tough face..but after 5 minutes with him his infectious smile comes out and you realize he's a big teddy bear.

http://joshhiman.blogspot.com

Above is the link to Josh's blog. He's an amazing guy and I would love it if anyone who sees this would keep him (and ALL of the soldiers) in their prayers. God Bless.

Be All That You Can Be..But Not an Toothless Mans Escort

Top O' the mornin to ya - Frequently over the years, I have had many friends tell me that things/situations happen to me that do not happen to anyone else they know (thus the reason for my blog). I always say "no way, I'm sure stuff like this happens to people all the time"..and then I'm proven wrong. Let the story begin.



One of my dearest friends is getting married (YAY!) in September and as one of her maids of honor I decided it would be a good idea to get my big ole' booty in shape for the upcoming nuptials. I started going to the gym in my building much more frequently and trying my very hardest to avoid those delicious little mini chocolate covered donuts in the grocery storewho haunt my dreams every night. While trying my hardest not to fall off of the treadmill one night- I was approached by a man (we will call him BOB so he doesn't stalk and kill me) whom I've seen training people in the gym before. Long story short- I told him I would pay him to train me. Fast forward a few weeks and I've now learned he's a bit sketchy- he tells me things like "eventually I'll just train you for free and you won't have to pay me anything" and constantly asks me if he can "trust me". Soooo the other night he calls me and basically says that he would like to train me for free if I will "get dolled up, go out with him and act the part". He says that I just need to look good so that other people will see how his services have worked. I officially get creeped out because he says I can't tell anyone about this "arrangement" not even my roommate. SKETCHYYYY. He now calls me at work, on my cell phone and I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to hire a body guard to protect me from my EX- personal trainer. GREAT.



So the lesson here kids is- not only can you prevent forest fires, you can also prevent wierdos trying to have you be their escort by avoiding my building while in gym clothes and do not talk to a big guy missing one of his front teeth.



Off to dye/cut my hair and change my name.



Adios, Blogurittos!